Wanted: Grad Couch

By: Madison GR

Dear “whoever is stopping us from having a grad couch”,

Last year at North Toronto, my life made sense. I would walk to my locker (that was right by my home form and not on a random floor where I had no classes), I would go to the caf to grab myself a cookie or two (the size of those were actually worth spending more than a dollar on) and maybe even a chocolate milk. I loved walking the halls of NT, especially when I passed through foyer. I would always see the grade 12s sitting under the stairs on their Grad Couch. They seemed so wise, so happy, so high status. I would stare at them and imagine I was sitting right beside them talking about universities, grad trip and prom. Whenever I felt depressed that I was still a lonely, confused grade eleven, I just thought to myself “Don’t worry Madison, next year this will be you, turn that frown upside down!” It worked for me every time! I knew that soon it would be my time to shine. When the school year began, I had mentally prepared myself; I had been waiting for this moment my entire high school life. I walked around the new building on the first day, on a mission to find the coolest spot for the couch. The gallery that overlooked the commons was perfect; it was the empty, tucked away little corner that would soon become my second home. All of the grads were so excited. A few days went by and still no couch. Then I said to myself “Oh maybe the school can’t provide the couch, yeah that’s probably it.” So a few days later, a group of young NT men carried a couch thirteen long blocks to the school. That was it, there was going to be a grad couch, the time had finally come. JOKES! The couch got denied. This is a sad reality the grads face now. And don’t be naïve grade 11’s, 10’s and 9’s, this affects you too! Guess we grads will just have to find other ways to assert our powers, through randomly stuffing grade 9’s into lockers, and messing with the grade 10’s civics or careers projects. As for grade 11’s, we’ll leave them alone, since they’re irrelevant to begin with, aren’t they? I mean they’re no longer junior students (congrats), but they’re not nearly as cool as the grads, not even close, not even kind of close. Just think of all the terrible things that could happen with a bunch of Grade 12s that feel neglected and are raging with fury. LOOK OUT. Now, now, I’m just kidding, North Toronto has a zero tolerance bullying policy so none of the grads can really do anything, except cry and whine that we don’t have a grad couch. WE WANT A GRAD COUCH YA HEARRR MEH? WE WANT IT AND WE WANT IT NOW! Come on North Toronto, we’re in this together, we can’t let the haters stop us from doing our thang; a grad couch is a tradition! Please and Thank you.

With all due respect,

The Grads.