Amani Taurd

A guide to some of the best and worst horror movies of all time

Whatever it is you are doing during March Break is not cool.  You could be going to see John Lennon and George Harrison come back from the dead and go to a Beatles reunion concert, and it wouldn’t be half as cool as watching horror movies the entire
break.  Of course, when it comes to horror movies, there are a lot out there.
Some are great, others are horrifying (and not in a good way).  So, in order to help you choose what to watch during the break, I am giving you reviews of some of my favourite and most popular horror movies out there.

Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining (R)

A classic horror movie.  I’d say it’s worth watching, since there are some common jokes made about it, but I wouldn’t say it’s one of the best movies out there.  Certainly, it has a few creepy sights, and a few times you’ll have to grab on to the person next to you, but overall, I’d give it a 3.5/ 5.

Teeth (R)

This one is not as well-known, but it gets a 5/5 in my book.  This movie is an indie
horror/comedy on purpose. Whether you think it’s a horror or comedy depends on
your gender.  Basically, it’s about a girl who has teeth in her vagina.  If
you’re a man, you’ll be grabbing your mother’s throw pillows and protecting
your crotch with all your might; and if you’re a girl, you won’t stop
laughing.

Saw I (R)

As usual, the original is better than the sequel, and this one is the best out of the seven movies in the Saw franchise.  I’d say that the first Saw gets a 4/5, but be aware that they do all go downhill from there.  The first one at least delivers quite a few chills and thrills. It’s worth watching.

The Ring (R)

This one is good, for sure.  It easily gets a 4.5/5.  It
manages to deliver some pretty good scares, and it will probably make you
scared of watching TV for the next few weeks.  Not to mention, the story is quite good, and the plot doesn’t fail to please.  I’d totally recommend watching this.

Rosemary’s Baby (R)

5/5.  This one literally gave me nightmares.  If you are looking
for a movie without any gore at all, without psychopathic murderers, and
without excessive screaming, this one is for you.   This is the kind of movie that will have you gripping the armrests in fear, and when it’s over you’ll realize that you
haven’t let out a breath in ages.  It’s scary.

Poltergeist (PG)

This is what people considered a “family horror” back in the ’80s.  I’d say it’s cute, but since cute isn’t what most people look for in their horror movies, I’d give it a 3/5.  It’s got some pretty good ideas, and it is a bit of a classic, so watch it to understand the pop culture references that people make from it.

The Silence of the Lambs (R)

This one gets a 4.5/5, since I really would have liked it to be longer. This one delivers a fair amount of thrills, to the point where I remember yelling at the screen.  It gives
you a great Hannibal Lecter performance, along with a great murder-mystery
component.  Think of this as a psychopathic, serial killer- centered, scary version of Sherlock Holmes.

The Woman in Black (PG 13)

I went to watch this movie twice…and it was scarier the second time around.  I think that says it all.  This movie easily gets a 5/5; it’s scary, mysterious, with beautiful shots, and not to mention the plot is fantastic.

The Devil Inside (R)

This movie is probably the stupidest horror movie I have ever seen.  The acting was mediocre, the filming was bad, and the plot was horrible.
This movie seriously only goes from bad to worse.  If there was anything about this movie that scared me is how badly done it was.  I’d give it a 1/5, because there were two scenes that freaked me out a little bit.  If you’re going to watch it, watch
it to learn how not to make a movie.